At the end of April, our family moved. While this would have been the fourth move for my husband and I since getting married in 2010, we would be leaving the only home our sons had ever known. Our littlest is almost 8 months, so the move would not affect him much. However, our toddler, who just turned 3, would have a more difficult time leaving the familiarity of his house, so we prepared months in advance in order to have a smooth transition. Here is what we did…
Our toddler during our very first walk-through of our now-home. We felt it in our bones that this house was meant for us, so we took a picture of him sitting in the bookcase wall.
INVOLVED THE KIDS IN EVERY STEP OF THE PROCESS: Don’t get me wrong, even just the thought of hauling a toddler and a baby to an unknown number of walk-throughs, and then every step of the process after we had chosen a home was daunting to me. However, we knew that if we wanted our son to feel apart of what was happening and to be comfortable with it, he had to come with us every step of the way. That meant he went to every walk-through while we were looking, and once we put an offer in on a house he came to the inspections, the final walk-through, and even some of the signing. He was there when our realtor came to our home to discuss inspection and appraisal results and watched mom and dad buy the house from the very beginning to the very end. Because of this, he never had a question of what was going on because he had a clear understanding that we were looking for a new place to live as a family.
I LET HIM PAINT OUR MOVING BOXES: This one was fun! He went with us every time we gathered moving boxes from our local Uhaul store, and then I set him loose with paint on the kitchen table to decorate the boxes we would use to pack. While he was painting I would repeat to him why we had gotten the boxes and what they would be used for. I would make a point to thank him for being so helpful to us as we prepared to move. He was so proud of those boxes and it was fun for him to discover them in the garage of the new house once they were unloaded.
Having fun painting our moving boxes.
Never a dull moment ;)
WE MADE UP A SONG TO REMEMBER OUR NEW ADDRESS: Before we even moved into our new home, our toddler had our new address memorized. We made up a little melody and put our address to it and sang it to each other frequently each day until he had it memorized.
WE DROVE BY OUR NEW HOME FREQUENTLY DURING ESCROW: In the two months between having our offer accepted and closing on our new home, we drove by almost every day if we were in town. It was exciting to see what the house looked like during different parts of the day, you know like how it looked at 10am one day, and then 10:05am the next ;). In all seriousness, it was fun to drive through the neighborhood and see what kind of activity there was and that we would be apart of soon. We took every route in and out of the neighborhood multiple times so that our son got used to what it looked like as we were going “home”. By the time we actually closed on the house he knew exactly how to get there from just about every place we came from.
WE FREQUENTLY CAME TO PLAY NEAR OUR NEW HOME DURING ESCROW: There is a walking path and some baseball fields near our new home, so while we were closing on the house during those 2 months, we frequently came over to ride bikes, walk, play in the trees and watch baseball games. This allowed our son to get used to being in his neighborhood and to get comfortable with the area. He even lovingly nicknamed the trees we play in “the dark woods”. It’s stuff like that that really helps kids feel excited about something.
Watching sunset baseball in our neighborhood before moving in.
Playing in “the dark woods” before we moved in.
Hanging out with baby brother in “the dark woods” before moving in.
HE HELPED US PICK OUT NEW FURNITURE: In all honesty, this one was probably the hardest thing we did during our intentional steps to prepare our toddler to move. More than once we had to leave a furniture store because of a meltdown, and one time I even lost him for a couple minutes as he had wandered outside to watch a train in the distance. However, even with those challenges, I don’t regret taking him. We do things as a family around here and he loved going with us and sitting on different couches and chairs to test them all out.
Playing with “blocks” at the furniture store, AKA: table color samples.
WE TALKED ABOUT THE NEW HOUSE EVERY DAY AND GAVE IT A NICKNAME: Every day I would incorporate ways to talk about the new house. We talked about it so much we gave it a nickname, which we still use even now that we’ve moved in. We prayed thanks and gratitude over the house when we went to bed, and we collected and gathered items for our mud kitchen we planned to build when we moved in. When packing and setting things aside to take to donate, we would talk about why we were doing those things to move. Not a day went by for 2 months that we didn't talk about the new house and prepare our hearts and minds for it. Our toddler was well saturated with excitement and thankfulness for the new house by the time we moved.
WE LET HIM PICK OUT HIS ROOM: During a meeting at the new house during escrow, we showed our son the rooms that he could choose from and he picked which one he wanted to be his. This way, he could picture in his mind what his new room was whenever we would talk about it before moving. Also, whenever we drove by, we were able to point to his window and say “look at your new room!”
THINGS ONLY GOD CAN ORCHESTRATE: After purchasing our home we found out that some friends of ours we met in past seasons of life lived across the street! The first night we moved in, those friends walked over to greet us and even gave us an air mattress for our toddler to sleep on since his bed was tucked way back in the moving truck. There could have been no sweeter way to be greeted into our new home than with neighborly gospel-love like that. The first night was the one thing I was unsure about how it would go, and it went absolutely perfect because of the love of our new neighbors and the fun air bed and blankies they shared with our son. Only God could have prepared that for us.
Racing into his new home after we got the keys!
A boy who is excited to be HOME!
I hope these tips help you navigate the transition of moving if you have little ones. I have found that even though kids crave stability and structure, they are equally as resilient and able to change as long as the adults in their life help them through those transitions. Plenty of involvement and frequent talk about moving to a new home resulted in our toddler not being scared or resistant, but excited and ready to make the change!